Thursday, March 19, 2009

An Ode to Myself

The world has fucked me in so many ways, till I no longer need a condom. It goes completely raw even if I beg for it not to!

No matter how often I make a pledge to get every single dollar that I feel I am worth, from every single dude I fuck, a bitch like me somehow falls in love or decides its NOT WORTH it at the end.
I have been in love with only 2 men. Both of which have taught me this one lesson. ALWAYS HAVE SOMEONE THAT LOVES YOU MORE THAN YOU LOVE THEM

The Lord loves me and he hears my cry, more importantly he doesn't give a damn if I make dumb promises to you that I can't keep. He wants me to be happy in the end and really thats all that matters.
No matter how powerful the hold a man may have on you, its your decision to let him go. If he treats you bad, even if your emotions overflow with love, leave that zero alone. I promise it will only get worse

I am in the fight of my life, I may be bigger than my opponent in size but my heart is definitely smaller.
I am judged everyday of my life, but I know that the biggest judge of them All (Big Baby Jesus) loves me more than he will ever know, so it keeps me fighting for what I think is right, even if you think its wrong.

They say you are what you eat, so I guess I'm as messed up as I seem.
Even with the times I have been molested, held against my will and forced to do things I didn't want or need to do, I never consider myself a victim. The Lord said "vengeance" is mine.

The more days I live, the harder it is not to want more, I ask him to enlarge my territory and more and more men come into my life.
Married Men are like baby wipes, they smell so good when you open the pack, but once they are used for their worth they stink just like everything else.

I love myself, really hard, more than anyone could love me, mainly because I talk to myself at least 3 times a day, question every decision I make and rarely understand the point behind my actions.
I take responsibility for every action, I admit when I'm wrong only to myself and I have a potty mouth.

I know the Lord isn't done with me yet!

2 comments:

Pana March 21, 2009 at 9:40 AM  

SO True REAL talk

screeeeeeename September 6, 2009 at 8:52 AM  

ummm

just so long as the Lord has started on you